You have been searching for peace in objects. By “objects” here is meant, for instance, certain non-ordinary experiences, certain states, certain relationships, the fulfillment of certain desires, the achievement of certain actions, and so on. You’ve been searching for peace, in short, in whatever is “not-me” but is supposed to “complete me.”
This search, in fact, fails time and again. See this for yourself.
And so, alas, you keep changing the objects in the hope that this new one will bring you to lasting peace. It doesn’t. The relief comes and it goes and thus you’re back at square one.
At some point, though, you stop the outward-going search and open up to a very natural possibility.
Could it be that the peace you’ve been seeking is, in truth, the peace of your very being? Could it be that right here and now you are indeed peace itself?
Try it: close your eyes and go deeply, naturally wherever the following question is pointing: “What if what you essentially are is peace itself?”
Open here, be silent, and blossom into this wordlessness.
“It feels like nothing, like no-thing.”
Let go of the resistance, and ask the question again. Be very quiet. See with the eyes of a child. Be without thinking.